Create Change With Simple Gestures!

We live in a time of social expression, but very little personal interaction.  We reach out through texts and social media platforms, but it almost becomes alien to reach out a hand to someone who needs us.  As we experience an explosion of technology that transforms from moment to moment, we work so hard to keep up.  Unfortunately, in the process, we lose a bit of our humanity as well.

As we tune out the world around us to embrace the one in our phones and tablets, it becomes easier to look past the homeless person on the side of the road.  We find it easier to judge people online, and that judgement can become bullying.  We see tears as cute emojis, and we begin to lose the compassion that made us human.

People struggle with depression, post-traumatic stress Disorder, Bipolar Disorder, Anxiety, and so many other mental illnesses, but do we see them as a person, or a label?  When will we finally realize that we need to come together to remove the stigma around mental illness, and open our hearts to the person who is diagnosed.  In fact, we are more willing to rally behind individuals with cancer than those with mental illness.  Why can’t we just support those who need us, whether they are physically or mentally ill?

It is time to put down the phone, even if it is just for a moment, each day.  Take that time to make a difference.  You can inspire someone who is struggling, listen to someone, smile at others and make eye contact, volunteer, donate time or money, let someone know you care, or any gesture, large or small.  Just one small act of kindness can create a ripple effect.  If you have time to send a text, you have time to make an impact.

 

 

From Victim To Victor: Be an Initiator of Change!

We live in a volatile world, an ever evolving landscape of humanity, and we work in environments where the masses merge to create a common goal.  There are problems that exist everywhere and incorporate major issues like gaps in treatment and pay stemming from differences in gender, generation, race, education, economic status, and so much more.  These conflicts create hostility, and this bleeds into the fabric of corporate, personal, and social relations.  Is this how we wish to live?  Do we want people in 100 years to view us as a century of turbulence?

While it may be impossible to escape victimization at times, it is possible to choose to be a victor.  You see, victimization happens to us, but we do not have to become a victim.  We can take our unique perspective of our experience, and utilize it to initiate change in the world.  We can choose to grieve over the loss of who we were before we were victimized and channel this into empowerment.  We can choose to accept what we deserve and nothing less.  We can choose to stand up to victimization and say it is wrong.  We can choose to not victimize others in the process.  This is what makes us victors.

There are statistics that clearly show discrepancies in pay for people of different races and between men and women.  Is this acceptable to us as a society in 2015?  Have we not learned from a past riddled with the oppression of others to rise above?  I know of people who have suffered from age discrimination, but it would be nearly impossible to prove.  What has happened to our values and morals?  Business ethics is still taught in college, yet it is conveniently dismissed when it goes against the bottom line.

Now is the time for our collective generations to come together and to make change that is positive for our personal and professional lives.  If we can learn to stop victimizing, and to stop accepting the acts of victimization that occur each day, we all win.  We can all be victors in a society that moves to build a brighter future.

Does this sound impossible?  Absolutely!  With so many people unwilling to change, it is not realistic.  However, you have the choice to be a victim to ignorance, or to become the victor.  Each person can make a difference, even if it is a small one, and many small ones may be what sparks the bigger changes. You have the choice, and by recognizing this, you take accountability for your actions.  Choose wisely!

10 Steps to Becoming Extraordinary and Empowering Others!

One thing that I have noticed is that people are always seeking out that mentor, that powerful person who will lead them to accomplish great things.  This is what we do because the world is a scary place, and having someone by your side, offering advice and encouragement, can go a long way.  There comes a time when a transition must take place.  Success is measured differently by everyone, and while you may still need guidance to rise to the top, there are always ways to inspire those left behind.  By taking the world by storm and embracing your inner strength and passion, you are enabling others to do the same.  It is like a domino effect.  While not everyone will jump on the plane to soar to new heights, there are a few who will, and you can be an inspiration to help them to do this.

Plenty of people follow their dreams and become successful without a thought to how they can help others, but this can change.  Every person who chooses to empower others automatically encourages those individuals to do the same as they rise in the ranks.  It is crucial to recognize that there is potential in everyone, but not everyone has the drive and determination to channel their potential.  This is why only a select few will listen and follow your lead.  Perhaps only one or two out of a room of 100 will take initiative.  This does not mean you have failed, it means those who have excelled, were ready to, and the others are still finding their way.

How can you empower others?

1.  Believe in yourself and be confident, not cocky.  If you can be a strong leader, you will automatically encourage others to be the same.

2.  Recognize that other people are not you.  No one will take the exact same path you did, and if you expect others to do what you did, you will always be disappointed.

3.  One of the greatest skills a leader can have is the ability to listen.  If you become a mentor or have people working under you, you need to truly understand who they are, how they work, and what they believe.  You will be amazed at what you learn about others and how this can improve your approach.

4.  Take the extra time to teach others.  You can be a leader, but if you do not teach others so they too can be successful, you are not a very good leader.  You should always find a way to help others to grow.

5.  Be likeable.  Charisma is a powerful force in a great leader.  If people do not like you, they will not follow you.  You should relay anecdotes and show others your humanity.

6.  Realize who your audience is and how they learn.  If you show you truly care, they will also care about you and what you have to teach them.

7.  Be a good influence.  Make decisions based on your integrity and values.  Be someone others can rely on, and you will empower others to do the same, even when the decisions are difficult.

8.  Be willing to accept criticism.  A great leader knows they have faults, and accepts responsibility for them.  If you know what your faults are, you can change them.  This instills a higher level of respect for you as well.

9.  Help others to see their strengths and improve their faults.  If you focus only on the faults, you will not empower others, you will make them less confident.  Also, have a plan to help others improve their faults, and maintain positivity about them.

10.  Realize that you cannot change everyone or empower everyone, but when you truly care about others, and do the best you can in your leadership roles, you can change at least one life, and that is truly extraordinary.

Why I Chose a Women’s College!

The Lehigh Valley, where I live, is full of colleges and universities.  Each school has its unique culture, great programs, clubs and activities.  In the heart of Allentown is Cedar Crest College, a women’s college founded in 1867.  Its campus spans many acres and is listed as an arboretum.  Its historic buildings mix with the contemporary, just as the traditions of the college have remained steadfast while welcoming change.  Every day, I walk to work and classes, to meetings and activities, and I feel truly at home and welcome.  This leads me to why I chose a women’s college.

Cedar Crest welcomed me as a continuing education student, and I found the environment to encourage growth, leadership, and success.  There are opportunities around each corner, and I have taken as many as I could over the years.  The faculty and staff want students to not only pass, but to excel, and they support creativity, initiative, and innovation.  I have found my education to be hands-on and it has focused on how to apply information gained to real world experiences.  In addition, I have found my voice at Cedar Crest.  I am now more empowered than ever, and I am ready to make changes in the world.  Not only am I ready, but I also believe that I can because Cedar crest has inspired me and instilled within me a higher level of confidence.  I believe in myself and my abilities, and I believe in each student who graduates from Cedar Crest because they have been given the tools to succeed if they choose to use them.

Cedar Crest College creates leaders.  This is a fact.  I am an example of what a women’s college can do in a modern world.  While Cedar Crest has a strong tradition, and so much history that is worthwhile to explore, it is the future that is so exciting.  Here I am about to graduate, and all I can think about is how much love I have for this incredible institution, and how can I be there as it evolves into the 21st century.  With exciting new programs in health care, a new MBA, and a strong new writing major, I am enamored with this dynamic path Carmen Twillie Ambar, Cedar Crest College’s esteemed president, is crafting.  She is continually meeting and exceeding challenges put forth by the needs of the college and community. This passion is catching, and I want to remain involved.  I can see myself becoming just as active as an alum as I am now, and working to help the college meet strategic goals.  I am more passionate about this unique world of higher education than I ever imagined I could be, and I hope to to use my skills in this way after graduation.

I look forward to walking across that stage in may and entering into a new chapter of my life as an alum of Cedar Crest College.  I also plan to give back because so many wonderful  donors to the college have helped to support my education. My last month of college is coming to a close, and I feel like this part of my life is one of the hardest to let go.  I have been truly affected by my experiences at Cedar Crest, and I am so incredibly thankful.  I know the new chapter will be exciting, and Cedar Crest will still be a major part of my life.  Perhaps I will even pursue my master’s degree there soon.  However, the undergraduate experience is a unique one, and it will be over for me in 5 short weeks.  The lifestyle I have known, the friendships created, and the overall experience will be gone physically, and only remain as memory.  I chose a women’s college because it was right for me.  It gave me more than I could have expected.  In fact, it changed my life forever.  I would choose Cedar Crest again, in a heartbeat.

Inspire Others Through Stories!

We are all agents of change, even if we do not realize it yet.  Just journeying through life changes us.  We can suffer great losses and deep pains which lends to a strengthened, sometimes stony core.  We submit ourselves to the infinite promises of love, baring our souls and becoming vulnerable.  Sometimes we find our expectations are met or surpassed, and sometimes we find the love we thought we had is nothing more than a splinter that if left in our hearts will fester.

Each moment, good and bad, shapes our individual stories and the path we take in life.  Some lives end beautifully as we reach seventy or eighty decades and drift peacefully into a lasting sleep.  Others end with with suffering and the realization that life does not come with guarantees.  Yet, most of us will find a way to embrace the fleeting moments of joy that hide through each day waiting for us to notice them.  It is the frosty breath that escapes us as we look at a fresh snowfall in the silence of early morning.  It is the warm hug and smell of soap as we hold our child after their bath and try to remember the scent, knowing they will grow up soon.  It can be the touch of a lover’s hand on yours, softly pulling you towards them for a tender kiss.  We all hold moments that make us smile and that give us light in our hearts when the dark days envelop us.

The stories that are the most important to us are the ones that can inspire others.  It is what makes us an individual, yet also relatable.  It is the woman who suffered years of abuse to finally rise above and counsel other women.  It is the story of a man who lost his partner to HIV, and now speaks out about the stereotypes which plague HIV sufferers leading to discrimination and harassment.  It is my parents story of how they have sacrificed the past 14 years of their life to be caregivers with very little if any help from other family members.  It is my story of advocating for my mentally ill son and my daughter who was born with half a heart.  These are the stories that tap into the hearts of others with a healthy dose of much needed humanity in a world full of disconnection.  These stories are individual yet universal, and they are inspiring, bringing hope and passion to others.  What is your story?

Ingenuity is Found in Imperfection!

We all strive for a level of perfection in our lives.  We desire a perfect relationship, the perfect career, perfect children, a well organized and perfectly maintained home.  There is a sense of pride and comfort that comes from perfection as we neatly tie our hair back, brush the wrinkles from our suit before a meeting, and make sure our grammar in a document is just right.  However, the world is not perfect, and as a part of the world, humans are far from perfect.  We can do everything in our power to remove the chaos from our lives and to tie our lives into a neat package with a bow on top, but are we being true to ourselves?

The truth is we spend more time trying to create the image we desire and we think others desire when we should spend more time valuing who we are.  We are all imperfect in a beautiful way that leads to diversity, unique creations and perspectives, creativity, and innovation.  The imperfections we have make each of us special and provides the ingenuity that makes us succeed.  If we can accept ourselves for who we are, embracing the differences, we can become confident and strong.  This leads to actions built on integrity, and we become genuine individuals which is what employers want.  Employers can be assured they are getting the person they can count on, not the one with a facade that must be broken down to reveal the truth within.

As you contemplate the direction you have taken with your life, consider who you really are.  What are you most afraid of, and are you being true to yourself.  Admit your flaws, and accept your weaknesses.  Be proud of what you have done, and make changes to become better.  When you are a genuine person, you will perform at higher levels because you are happy, you are grateful, and you feel complete.  This is what we should strive for in our lives, and the masks that we use to protect ourselves should be placed on the shelf because imperfection is truly the source for ingenuity!

Integrate Integrity Into Your Career!

Integrity!  This word is a powerful keyword used by businesses regularly when seeking employees and evaluating current employees.  Integrity makes up a percentage of the cornerstone of a good worker because it is essential for trust.  Employers want to know that the person leading 50 employees can do so while maintaining the standards, code of ethics, and values of the company.  This may sound obvious, but after sifting through social media posts of many people, it is clear that not everyone has the integrity we would like to think.  In fact, I have heard of many cases of employees on FMLA who are posting pictures of themselves partying, and people who call in sick to nurse the hangover from the night before.

Employers create a code of ethics because they need to ensure their company will run smoothly.  Co-workers depend on one another to complete operations, but one employee not adhering to the code of ethics can throw the whole team off course, and influence poor behavior in other employees.

How can you ensure you have the integrity to meet the demands of your employer?

First, know what they expect.  You should know the code of ethics, the mission statement, the values, and everything else that is pertinent to the running of and the behavioral expectation of the company.  Then, you should exhibit this behavior on a regular basis.

You should go above and beyond to show your employer that you not only know the expectations and can follow them, but that you actually care about them.  The employer who sees true integrity from you is more likely to trust you, and this can lead to a positive outcome for you.

Be the one to stand your ground on workplace values, and be a determined employee with an eye for what is right and best for the company.  Be the employee that the employer can trust!

Pursuing Your Potential!

Many people live in the past, spending a great deal of their time regretting decisions, and considering where they went wrong in life.  Others spend time in the present, working to achieve short-term goals and to pay the bills.  Then, there are those who live in the present without truly living.  They barely get by, and they do not work towards anything.  Finally, there are the few who see the long-term goals, the potential they have to achieve something great.  These people are the ones who have big ideas, who dream big, who think big, and have success written all over them.  This is a great place to be, but without the motivation and drive to actually pursue your potential, you will never get to those beautiful long-term goals that shine like stars on a lonely night.

Depending on the goals you have, you may have a great deal of work to do, and if you plan to be successful, you should plan to have a lot to do.  It takes hard work and dedication to reach a goal, and it must be something you believe in or have passion for or else you are more likely to give up.  Here are the three steps you should take to begin when pursuing your potential.

1.  Determine what potential you truly have.  In fact, go beyond determining and decide if this potential lends itself to a specific goal you have, and if you are truly passionate about this goal.

2.  Make a plan!  Figure out what your goal is, and make a plan to help you reach it.  This includes timelines.  You need to know when you will start, what steps you need to take, and what your goal date of completion is.  You should think of the challenges that may be faced, and how you can best deal with them.  You need to determine if you need contacts, if you need money, and any other important elements that will get you there.  Sometimes, this may mean education, or work experience.

3.  Push yourself to take the first step.  Make the calls, enroll in a degree or certificate program, determine the loan you may need, seek investors, network with other individuals who could be helpful, and be ready to sell yourself.  Sometimes, you will need to boost your social media presence to reach a goal, and this can be time consuming.  Prepare for the amount of time you will need to invest and stick with it.

It can be difficult, and only a small percentage of people truly pursue their potential.  However, the work put into it can be incredibly rewarding in the end!

Looking to the New Year Ahead!

The day has arrived.  A shiny new year has begun and people awoke with a buzz of excitement, nursing hangovers, and dreaming of accomplishing newly crafted resolutions.  I started my day like any other, but ideas, plans, goals, and dreams have been carried with me in my thoughts through the day.  I know I have an exciting year ahead, and a challenging one.

I will be graduating this May with my two bachelor’s degrees, and I will begin my journey into a career.  It is hard to describe the feelings that come to a soon-to-be-graduate because there are too many.  I have an overwhelming sense of accomplishment, knowing I have worked hard to achieve this goal.  In fact, it has been a six year process.  I also feel as though I have been provided invaluable skills and knowledge that will lead to an ability to move into a career.  I know the first half of the year will be full of classes, craziness, and sadly, the last semester of my undergraduate career.  I will maintain my expectations of myself, and I will graduate summa cum laude.  I will walk across the stage at graduation with a mix of pride and sadness.  A lump will fill my throat as I realize I am leaving behind the sights, sounds, and familiarity that has become a second home to me.

I will embark on a journey into the the world of job searching, learning the lingo, prepping resumes, and preparing for interviews.  I will carry the confidence I have gained with me into the workforce, knowing I am smart, strong, and capable.  I will perhaps consider graduate school, and finish my novel.  I have so many things that will fill my year with joy and achievement.  My educational and career goals will be a main focus for me this year, but there is something that must be considered in all things.  My family.

I love my family, and my son has had a challenging year with school and his behavior.  His mental illnesses have spun out of control, and it has been very difficult to work with him.  I will continue to get him the help he needs, but I will also work to help him to see his worth and potential because that will hopefully give him the strength he needs to change the path he is on.  The challenges I have faced as a mother with special needs children has been overwhelming at times, and I plan to continue to write and blog about advocacy issues because there are so many people who struggle with this problem.

I am truly excited to make this an incredible year, and I would love to hear the plans of others.  Please post any goals you may have or what you are most excited about in the coming year!

New Year’s Series: Resolution Planning Time

Now that we have completed the exercises over the past few days, you should have a list of your toughest lesson learned, the successes you have had over the past year, your past goals and dreams, and a SWOT table with your strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, and threats.  This is a lot of information, but it will help you to plan resolution like never before.  The reason it is hard to stick to resolutions is because we tend to come up with a general goal and give ourselves a year to complete it.  There is no real plan.

Your first task is to go through your lessons learned because if one of them is that you need to cut toxic relationships from your life before they drag you down, and you want to resolve to make a toxic relationship stronger this year, you need to remember what you have learned in the past.  After making your resolutions , you will revisit this list to make sure your previous lessons do not apply to any of your new resolutions.

Next, you need to look at your successes and study them.  Did you succeed a great deal in one aspect of your life like your career, but not in your personal life?  Perhaps you want to continue to build on these successes, or perhaps you want to balance things out and add resolutions that will focus on a different aspect of your life.  Think about what made you successful for everything on your list.  Perhaps you were passionate about these things, maybe you accomplished more in the first half of the year when you were thinking about your goals for the year, or at the end when you realized you had not accomplished what you wanted to yet.  This is important because it helps you to see how you think, plan, and work.

The next step is to look at past goals and dreams that were left behind.  Are any of these still relevant? Did you give up on them because you were not ready, you were scared, or perhaps it is a path you left behind and would rather leave it in the past.  We all change as we grow, and this includes goals and dreams.  This is where you should break out the highlighter and highlight any goal or dream you would like to rekindle.

Finally, go over your SWOT.  You should see what your strengths are.  Will these help you achieve your goals, and is there anything missing that you should try to develop?  With your weaknesses, it is important to know what they are and if you can try to change that aspect of yourself.  Opportunities to enhance your life, and make changes to yourself, to grow and learn, can lead to resolutions.  Finally, threats, what threats do you have to your success, and how can you work through them?  You should always be prepared for these threats and for the task to overcome them.

This in-depth look at yourself should have helped you to come up with some resolutions you may not have considered before.  Your last task is to make a list of everything you would like to accomplish in the next year.  For each item, you need to consider if a different resolution should come first, if it should be within a certain period of time, and if it should be during a specific time of year.  Each resolutions should have a date to start, and an expected date to finish.  You should try to spread your goals out and make sure this is something you incorporate into your schedule.  Most of us use a scheduler on our phone, online, or a planner.  You can add the dates for your resolutions to it, and even reminders.  If it is a big resolution, create steps to help you achieve it.  This should also be added to your planner.  A more detailed plan like this allows you to carry your goals through the year and gives you a timeline to work from.  Once you have your completed resolution plan, think about your lessons learned, make sure they still apply, and think about your strengths that will help you achieve your goals.

Now, you can begin the year right, with a plan that will help you to find success.  I wish you all the best of luck in this coming year.  2015 has the potential to be a magical year if you work hard!  I hope you will all update me as we near 2016, and let me know if this worked for you.  I would love to hear about successful resolutions!  Happy New Year!!!